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Although I’m quite the romantic at heart, the engineer in me can’t help but marvel at the number of everyday drama that would have been avoided, if only people were made to fill certain forms. So, in my ever-lasting quest to help out my fellow authors dream  up a better world, I give you The Perfect List of Forms for Every Occasion (many thanks to Michelle Proulx for bringing it to my attention).

How to use them in your book

The story could start with a simple invitation: your hero’s presence is requested at a company event.

by Imgur

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The event turns out to be a surprise party thrown by his company to congratulate him on a job well done. The president herself expresses her appreciation.

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While there, he meets a stunning young woman, and is immediately smitten. So much so, that he promptly fills in the appropriate form:

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The woman, however, has a secret. One that burdens her much, but that she can’t share without first filling in an NDA.

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The man refuses to sing it, and leaves. Naturally, she is terribly miffed at this, and sends him the terrible Airing of Grievance form.

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This knocks some sense into him. Regretting his rush decision, he seeks her forgiveness.

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After much hand-wringing, she accepts his apology.

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Naturally, he’s overcome with emotion.

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“We must wed at once,” he thinks.

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However, before she has a chance to accept, tragedy strikes:

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Then what?!

Well, the tragedy mentioned is that I’ve run out of cards, which means that you will have to finish the story yourselves. Do not despair, though: once you do, let me know and I will promptly send you one of these:

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