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eye description, eyes, Now Novel, nownovel, tips, writing tips
NowNovel recently posted a great post on how to describe eyes in a story. As they point out, many beginning authors over-rely on eye color to create an impression of their characters, but this is merely a first step. Instead, you can follow these tips to create a memorable description:
1. Make a characters’ eyes a source of contrast
As any trip to the local coffee shop will tell you, people’s appearances are often full of contrasts. The man with the big, ruddy face might have small, delicate hands. The woman with the angelic face may have a trucker’s hoarse voice. And so on. One way to describe characters’ eyes effectively is to use them to create contrast.
This can be particularly effective if the contrast is used to highlight a character’s “third dimension” – ie what makes them non-stereotypical. Having your villain glance with sympathy at a stray is jarring precisely because it’s so unexpected. And yet, even the most evil of people may be surprisingly fond of their pets.
2. Use eye description to support story development
One reason descriptions of novel characters’ eyes sometimes read as cliché is because authors describe eyes with no consideration of how that description fits into the story. “She glared at him with grey-green eyes” reads a little awkwardly because the character’s eye color is not particularly relevant. Drawing attention to it almost detracts from the key action here – the character’s anger.
Instead, you can use eye description at key points of character development. For example, if a character witnesses a horrific scene, their eyes might seem vacant or haunted. Or, a character’s eyes may show readers that person’s character or intent, as in this example from Dostoevsky, who uses adjectives to describe a character’s eyes in order to support the tone and mood of a scene: “two sharp and suspicious eyes stared at him out of the darkness.”
3. Describe the eye area rather than just eye color
To avoid clichéd eye descriptions, describe the eye area instead of describing color. For example, if there are bags underneath a character’s eyes, this conveys tiredness or anxiety. Eyes that are swollen, puffy or ringed with red indicate recent emotional distress. Narrowed eyes indicate hostility or suspicion. Half-closed eyes indicate drowsiness, and so on.
For more ideas on the subject, check out the full post on NowNovel.
rijanjks said:
Love this, Nicholas! Thanks for sharing.
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Nicholas C. Rossis said:
Many thanks for sharing! I noticed you had left a comment on the original post. I hope this one still had something to offer 🙂
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quillella said:
Super useful! I’ve been editing my work-in-progress, and half my descriptions of eyes are just “he had blue eyes”, or “she glared at him with brown eyes”; I’ve been wondering what was wrong with my writing. This illuminates what I’ve been doing wrong, so thanks for that 😀
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Nicholas C. Rossis said:
Yay! So glad you found it useful. Happy writing 🙂
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Scottie said:
I wonder how often I have gotten a feeling into a character from eye descriptions yet did not realize that was why? How often something we simply don’t put much emphasis on is so important to the story. Hugs
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Nicholas C. Rossis said:
Indeed, it’s a subtle yet powerful way of doing it. Hugs!
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The Story Reading Ape said:
Reblogged this on Chris The Story Reading Ape's Blog.
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coldhandboyack said:
I wrote a line once about, “… a large porcine woman with small narrow eyes.” I wound up cutting it, but it’s always stayed with me.
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Nicholas C. Rossis said:
Lol – yes, it’s a rather striking image!
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lovessiamese said:
Reblogged this on TheKingsKidChronicles and commented:
This is such a timely post. I am studying my craft, especially at my weakest point: description. Thank you so much for this post and the link to a more lengthy, detailed exposition. Reblogged from https://nicholasrossis.wordpress.com
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Tina Frisco said:
It never ceases to amaze me (why, I don’t know) that there’s always another angle to just about everything! There’s always a new way of looking at almost anything. And often I find myself saying, “Why didn’t I think of that?” One more example of why we all need each other ~ and why blogging is so rewarding. Thanks, Nick 🙂
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Nicholas C. Rossis said:
Yay! So glad you found it useful. Happy writing 🙂
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Smorgasbord - Variety is the Spice of Life. said:
Thanks for the link Nicholas and will head over and read the full article..
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Nicholas C. Rossis said:
Hope you find it useful 🙂
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Amanda Ricks said:
Great points. Your suggestion about the irrelevance of eye colour reminds me of a comment my friend Winslow Eliot made a few years ago. She said something like: if you talk about the deep blue curtains there has to be a reason and it should be referenced elsewhere in the story/book in order to make sense. The relevance thing stuck with me. Something I probably wouldn’t have thought of myself.
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Nicholas C. Rossis said:
Thanks! Your friend’s comment sounds like a variation on Chekhov’s gun, |I suppose 🙂
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Amanda Ricks said:
True enough. 😀
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OIKOS™-Redaktion said:
Reblogged this on WENEZIA™ – Weidens neue Mitte!.
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patriciaruthsusan said:
An interesting and helpful post, Nicholas. 🙂 — Suzanne
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Nicholas C. Rossis said:
I’m so glad you think so, Suzanne! Thank you 🙂
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allan hudson said:
Good info. Thanks.
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Nicholas C. Rossis said:
Thanks! I’m glad you thought so 🙂
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Bette A. Stevens said:
Excellent post, Nicholas! Thanks for sharing & have a great week. 🙂
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Nicholas C. Rossis said:
Thanks, I’m so glad you think so 😀
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kimwrtr said:
Reblogged this on Kim's Author Support Blog.
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aurorajeanalexander said:
Reblogged this on Writer's Treasure Chest and commented:
Author Nicholas Rossis provides us with 3 tips on describing eyes in a story. Thank you, Nicholas. This is very helpful!
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The Owl Lady said:
Reblogged this on The Owl Lady.
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Connie Flanagan said:
Having bought the book, I would highly recommend it to all writers. Nicholas, this section on the eyes is fascinating. I once wrote a short story in which I described very little about the physical appearance of a character other than her eyes. I do believe they reveal a great deal about a character, unlike hair colour, for example.
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Nicholas C. Rossis said:
Thank you so much, Connie! 😀
Yes, unless the hair color reveals something about the character (e.g the Targarien blond in Games of Thrones or a crazy color that defines the character as a “free spirit”), it’s pointless to delve on that.
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Connie Flanagan said:
There are a few stereotypes about hair, too, that may not apply to one’s character. My band teacher used to tease me that he suspected I had “blonde roots”. Lol.
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Nicholas C. Rossis said:
As father to a natural blonde, I have no idea what you’re talking about 😀
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T.E.Mark - Author said:
Smart post, Nicholas. It’s always nice to gain a new perspective on something we’re faced with regularly. We almost always need to describe our character’s appearance. And the eyes are typically the writer’s primary focus.
I enjoyed your post.
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Nicholas C. Rossis said:
Thank you so much, TE 🙂
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